2011

I can't believe it's already close to the end of Febuary 2011. Where does the time go? i know it's been a long time since I have written. The 1 yr anniversary of losing SHane has come & gone. It was terrible to be honest. Truman W Smith put on a memorial for their workers and Shane's family. It was heart wretching, almost like losing him all over again, but then it was good to, good to know they still think of him and miss him. They truly loved him as he did them he really loved his job there. Im going to try to write on here more but it will be mainly for me. Not private, anyone who knows about my blog can read it but Im not going to post it right now cause I want it for me.

Today is probably not the best day to write here because I feel kind of down. I feel alone and I don't know why. The 3 kids are here. Greg is here but I feel alone....Probably hormones or something. I miss my kids. I still feel such a lose of Shane. He was always just right around the corner, but not anymore. I miss my girls, it feels like forever since Ive seen them, they make me laugh so much! But it will pass. Like I said it's just hormones or just a fleeting feeling. I think it's a normal feeling for a Mother who has lost a child or even one who hasn't but her children are far away. I do not at all resent that they are far away. Both of my girls have made a good life for themselves. They have great husbands, both of them & now Cass has Noah. I truly am blessed by them and by my 3 GRANDchildren who at this moment are in there watching Shrek. They are amazing children.

So I will get off for now and next time I will be more positive.