Well we just pasted another first. The kids first Father's Day without their Daddy. It's really sad that Shane who loved his kids so much will only be a memory to them! Chloe' is older so she will have more memories that won't be quite as faded as the 2 little ones. Of course this Father's Day was harder on me & the girls than i think the kids. The weekend before Father's Day we bought flowers for the kids to "take" to Daddy cause I had all 3 of them. I knew Chloe' was going to be with her Mom so we took them then. Then Sunday we took the little ones back and they took him each a single silk rose. As we get there the kids say Daddy & go running to the headstone, and as our heart breaks we watch them lay their flower down then their done. They go running off as Greg & I stand there. Then Greg (he is such a good man!) goes off with the kids and lets me have a few minutes with Shane alone.

Then next week we will have another first, Shane's b~day. He would have been 30 on the 30th.

I am dreading it so bad! Chloe' wants to make a cookie cake for Daddy, so we are. I've made arrangements with her Mom to let her come and spend the night. We will make him a cake and take it to him. I know this sounds weird but it's what Chloe' wants to do so we will, it makes it a little easier for her I believe to do this. When she was selling Girl Scout cookies she had her Mommy take her up there to take him his favorite cookie. They had cookies there then left the box. it's still there. It is her way of grieving I think to do this so if it helps then this is how its done. We will release balloons for him also on his birthday.

So 6mths has gone by some ways it's getting easier then in alot of ways it's almost harder. I don't know why but I guess it's all a part of the process.

Cassey is coming home in about 3 wks. It's her first time home since this all happened. it will be hard for her I know cause she should be introducing Noah to Uncle Shane. Noah has such a great personna about him already Shane would have loved him! But with the help of the Lord above, we will keep on......

I just wanted to update everyone and ask you to continue to keep our family in your prayers. its been 6 mths but in someways it seems like yesterday.